Fuck Women's LibFor some fucking reason, I've started getting student loan bills in the mail. I wasn't supposed to see any of those until June. But now the facists want me to give them half of what I earn each month! So what I'm expected to do is quit my easy, only mildly soul-sucking job, dye my hair back to it's natural, boring blonde-brown, buy a god damn pinstripe suit and indenture myself for 8 hours a day at some get-coffee-for-cunthead-boss real job and rot there until I am cunthead boss, herself. It's what the feminists fought for in the 70's. The right for women to be asshole corporate slaves, too. But if you know me, you know I'm not cut out for that crap. I feel much more fufilled on my days off when I'm home vacuuming, reading, writing, doing laundry, cooking a big tasty dinner. Grocery shopping makes me giddy. Folding socks brings me inner peace. If this were 1954 and I were expected to marry right out of college, if my only job was to hit the salon with my gal-pal Mabel, gossip and get pretty for my husband, then go home and whip up a cassorole.. Hey, that's not so bad, girls! Why all the bra-burning? Fuck women's lib. Fuck feminism for de-feminizing women. I guess if a chick wants to put on a suit and suffer, it should be her right. But those of us who are sweet and humble, a little bit spacey, not good for much more than fucking and entertaining should still have the option of doing it the old way. (Being a 2000's housewife doesn't count. Cuz you're expected to go to the gym and still hold a job and drive an SUV and that doesn't exactly appeal to me.) Also, men have become so disgustingly spoiled. The "sexual revolution" has turned womenkind into their playground. They used to have to buy us a house before they could fuck us. Now, they just have to buy us a beer. What insentive do they have to stop acting like selfish, hornball teenage boys? And most men can't make a girl cum, anyhow. The least he could do is reward his girl for a lifetime of sub-par sex with a shiny new car. So if I can't be a 1950's housewife (in an adorable polka dot dress) and refuse to be a modern corporate slave, then what can I do? How can I pay off these pestulant student loan bills? I'm not sure yet. It'll take me a while to figure things out, but I'm sure I can scrape up a 2nd or 3rd only mildly soul-sucking job. Or go teach English overseas. I'm still considering that, but it makes me incredibly nervous. So fuck men today for not being worth marrying. Fuck women's lib for sending pretty young girls to financial hell. And fuck me for not being good at 2006.
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