Thursday, June 03, 2004

How to Dodge Debt the Sneaky White Trash Way

If they can't find you, they can't make you pay. It is very convenient that you will be in Seattle.

Close any bank accounts you have and use envelopes from now on. Or get someone to open you a secret account with "education fund" in its title. My dead mom's friends did that for me. It's great. People get confused and donate to it, sometimes.

Don't let the banks or credit card companies know where you work. They will garnish your wages.

Don't answer the phone when they call you. If they don't have proof you are at your address, they can't bang on your door late at night.

And remember that money is only good until the oil runs out.

Sure, these techniques will ruin your credit, but unless you're striving to drive a fancy car or get a cell phone (which you already have) or another credit card (which you shouldn't have), credit doesn't really mean shit. The credit they check when you try to get an apartment is housing credit. Really, the only bill you ever need to pay is rent. And phone and internet, if those things are important to you.

It is merely a question of who needs the money more..

Good luck.

-A
posted at 3:12 PM |